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THE GLOW OF GOODNESS

by with No Comment LifeLifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

June 28, 2018

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Life, Lifestyle

THE GLOW OF GOODNESS

Life is run by the never ending strands of Goodness, much of which we are not aware of as we enjoy and sail through them ; some of which we are made aware when it glows occasionally making them visible. These “glows” apparently ensures humanity - the hope and happiness of spreading it further. This is an excerpt from a situation of a surgery focusing on the surgeon and the Glow of Goodness. Ultimately, we all thrive on this energy of Goodness - of some known and many unknown.

As my daughter (who is a human(e) doctor by default and nature, and a film story/script writer by passion) coerced me into the much postponed surgery for me, I was learning the “unknown’s indices” and uncertainties of life as a patient. The best thing she did was to identify the surgeon whom she had great regards for. From the first meeting in which the surgeon unambiguously informed after a check up that I needed to undergo an intervention operation and set the target days between as 7 to 10. I haven’t been able to study me as a patient- but I am considered as a worrisome one in that role.

In a time in which we have many doctors and surgeons (especially in urban areas), and options of corporate hospitals to primary health centers, I was impressed by the professional approach of this surgeon- who was more than willing to tolerate my every doubt (which never ended!). I could feel he could have been none other than a surgeon. Professional, simple, straight, energetic, limited but precise and clear in this thoughts and words and above all confidence in what he was doing.

There was sequence of events- pre and post operation- which included regular caring visits every day, listening and reassuring, holding on to my hand in the Operation theatre just before the procedure and assuring that “just relax sir, we will take care of you” and similar mind relaxing gestures which helped me to face the test of time. With a surgeon like him around, I felt comfortably positioned as somebody who is genuinely cared for.

To cut short memories and to the theme of the topic.

As he said after a week after the operation that I can leave, the Hospital did not agree to take the fees from me. My wife who was with me through all nights was surprised. The management said that the Surgeon has made it clear that he was doing the surgery “free” for me. When he himself is not collecting his genuine fee the Management felt that they should not get anything from me (especially so since my daughter worked there for an year and a half and was liked so much there). I was firm that it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t after all just the bill that needed to be paid with “money” but the care, compassion and concern of many others that needed to be acknowledged by me.

I decided to ask the Surgeon on the day of discharge while he gave instructions to me on post operative care , “Doctor, why don’t you please accept the surgeon’s fee, for all the efforts you have been taking?. Before I could complete, he interrupted “No, sir, the top-up you have give me and family has still more space to be charged”. It didn’t click me. As I tried convincing , he stopped me with a smile “still charge is remaining- hope you understand!”

My daughter reminded me of the incident that happened two years back. Her senior colleague – an efficient and respected lady gynaecologist needed a help. Two injured young stray dogs were hurt and abandoned at the gate of their home and were suffering. Their cries were upsetting not only her but also her young daughters. She in some place felt responsible for it and helpless at the same time. They were finding difficulty in identifying somebody who could save, treat and take these dogs away to a secure place. Her concern was genuine. They were constantly disturbed by the painful cries and grumblings of these poor creatures. After talking to her I understood her concern and worry for the animals (and that made me realize how compassionate and good they were!). I tried all official mechanisms to take the animals away from their home for treatment but it was difficult (which I knew!). Finally, I asked one of my students, a good veterinarian, who is a Faculty now for help and he whole heartedly obliged. With much efforts he through an NGO did took the dogs away and treated them.

I had forgotten this incident.

The Surgeon again repeated “ The two nights of disturbed sleep and worry for the dogs are unexplainable. You went out of the way to help us”. The lady gynecologist was his wife. He continued “what I am doing is my duty of sharing knowledge of medicine and surgery”.

I was too awestruck to respond.

It wasn’t the money, but the Glow of Goodness that comes out of the blue that surprises us and spreads a sweet joy of life.

It’s amazing how we could be carriers of this glow, every moment of our life. And how my student, the lady gynecologist, the surgeon- Dr. P.V.Srinivasan, the sisters of Cluny and my daughter could form a loop of this glow that gave this insight to me!

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The cell phone in the family: creating congeniality

by with No Comment Lifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

March 29,2020

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Lifestyle

The cell phone in the family: creating congeniality

As cell phones become integral part of everyday life the nature of interactions between individuals undergo changes. This is more evident and intense in a family unit under a home. The quintessence of “listening, sharing and caring” - the foundation bricks of family - are also getting influenced by this technology. Some thoughts on few situations which are becoming common in families are shared. Accordingly a new order of Family is evolving. Creating congeniality is about responsible use of cell phones in a family, and adjusting to the use of cell phone by another member.

The setting is a family in a home. A relationship that sustains is built on “listening, sharing and caring”.

The advent of technology has ensured that a cell phone or TV is an active added member of the family taking off the time from personal notations between members, shifting largely to impersonal notations. People drive two wheelers in busy streets with the phone sandwiched between their ear and shoulder, as if the acrobatics is an unavoidable emergency , but for which existence is in peril! That’s an attitude. Beware of the same attitude in a different nature which seeps into homes too!

Two decades back it was the common TV which was viewed in common , who was the added member in a family. In one way it used to pull the members around the TV, though choices of programmes slowly crept as an issue. With more channels coming up, the idea has turned disruptive making more TVs to enter a home.

Now every member has an added member in the family- the cell phone or the smart phone. As a one point edutainment tool it is stunning the mass by its potential of omnipresence.

What difference does it make or can make in a family?

The personal bonds between husband, wife, children and grandparents are quite important. They are experienced through the personal notations of emotions. They strengthen the trust and cohesion among members. Whether its smiling, laughing or shouting you are sure to have a response on the other side (non-responding is also a response!). With the active presence of the third techno-member (the cell phone), the nature of these responses is changing. Each member is attached to the appendage of the smart phone and work-stations mushroom inside a home. Sometimes the family members in a room sit, chat or talk on the phone, often without communicating or not-so-effectively communicating between themselves. This would sometimes create a complexity among the receiver of the communication, (whoever it is). (S)he may not be getting the responses as it should have been. This results in annoying, worry, anxiety… for the other family member(s).

The tech invasion

Some common situations in a present day home wherein tech-member puts the knotty knots.

  1. A dialogue between husband and wife/ or child and parents .

Wife: “I told you”.

Husband: “No, you didn’t tell me”.:

Probably (s)he would have told! But the person who received (or not received) the message would have been in the virtual world with the tech-member and would have not “listened’ actively.

If this dialogue is extended with explanations and counters, its not going to be congenial. The tech-member (the cell phone) has the final laugh!

___________________

  1. Prayer at home which used to be in a serene subtle and silent environment (irrespective of religions!) has now sounds amidst. We need to start learning to pray amidst the sounds of music from a Radio or TV around.

______________________

  1. “I forgot”

Many commitments to self, family and society gets slipped when we dive deep into the virtual world of “friends”, “likes”, ‘shares”, ‘images’ and “videos” which gushes incessantly in a cell phone. A cell phone is a battle ground of facts and fictions. This virtual world should be conscientiously connected so as not to be deceived! Involvement with the cell phone should not grow out as a reason for forgetting many routine commitments.

The requirements of a day-to-day management get sunk in the excessive attention to tech-member. Repetitive “I forgot” is not congenial from the perspective of “other’ member(s ) of the family. Over a period of time this can lead to a lighter degree of insensitivity which can affect the “caring, sharing, and listening” factors of a home.

________________________

  1. Food connects a family. Whoever cooks its important that the elements of pleasant emotions are also added as ingredients to the food prepared in a home. For this (s) needs to spend time sparing the cell-phone while cooking and serving. Imagine 20 years back before the tech invasion mothers or grandmothers cooked, served and persuaded you to have more food. This “heart in food’ is losing its shine with the advent of the tech-members. (the discussion on swiggy and zomato is Not Applicable here!)

_______________________________

  1. Children enter into a world of amazing games and other programmes in phone. They continue to get connected with their games, while eating, drinking, running, meeting people.. and so on. All these activities get sidelined since the mind of the child is in the activity based on cell phone. They tend to do all these to satisfy the elders and this affects the quality of personal interactions with individuals and the right way of having food.

_________________

  1. The other way round: the elders may get involved in TV and intensively with the cell phone, the quality time spend with the children comes down. They like the children to learn (or do works like homework) as fast as possible so that they can get back to the “virtual connected world” at the earliest. These results in eagerness and impatience in some elders/parents to see what they want. They want children to do things in their terms. The personal notations start changing!

_______________________

  1. Like computers changed the function of an office system, smart phones are turning as game changers in the family. It’s good as far as we are aware of this so that family relations in future are not entirely built upon the availability or functioning of smart phones.

______________________________

The fast advent of technologies over last few decades has created a present mix (segments) of generation from a technology perspective. The heterogeneous segmented generation (Gen) in the present day consists of google/smart phone Gen, Pre Google/cell phone Gen, MTV Gen, Doordarshan Gen, Pre TV Gen, Radio Gen, …Expectations of interactions of different segments could be largely different. Positioning of congeniality is often based on the types of segments which interact. The “right “ and “wrong” has different definitions within and between “segments”.

The opportunities of a cell phone is like that of a “Genie” let free. As far we know and control the Genie its fine; if Genie starts controlling us we will be shortly seeing a new family order and society, which many of us may comment as not congenial.

The personal space of “listening, sharing and caring” should never be allowed to be purchased by a technology. Creating congenitally for family is a responsibility to preserve the order and function of a family for the future.

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The Art of Arrogance

by with No Comment LifeLifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

August 16, 2017

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Education

The Art of Arrogance

One of the examples that I use to quote in a lecture of communication is of how a same signal bears different meaning in two countries. For eg. In UK (or elsewhere as applicable) a car or vehicle approaching opposite to your vehicle, if blinks its headlamps, on a highway it would mean courtesy, which may be read as “I am stopping and waiting, you may please go first”. In India the same blinking of headlamps would read “I am advancing (or overtaking), mind you, keep your vehicle to the safe side till I go first”. This is to summarize the attitude of a driver, which is more important than the mechanical skills of driving that defines a “driver” and hence driving.

The “Wheel”, one of the greatest inventions of human history, has developed over civilization timelines to design the diverse vehicles of the present day. Roads are the lifelines of development. However the use of these lifelines depends on “humans”, whose attitude decides how “order” is created in the new social situation ie. “the traffic”.

  1. The smirk of the bicycle rider as he looks back and wanes from a scene, narrowly escaping the scathe of a near-to-hit accident with your vehicle
  2. The awkward posture of the day – phone squeezed between the ear and shoulder, with side-bend neck during the two wheeler drive.
  3. Vehicles that buzz through (overtake) on four sides of your vehicle (not over!)
  4. Parking vehicles on the road, rather than on the sides, and talking to friends.
  5. Parking – be it a two wheeler or four wheeler- with least consideration for the vehicles parked adjacent/near by, making it difficult for another fellow driver to move his/her vehicle form the parked lot.
  6. Honking from behind (or anywhere else) pushing the driver to advance the car or vehicle genuinely waiting for a signal: the horn-shove.
  7. Rushing with that extra speed, desperately to cross the traffic signal, while amber giving way to red.

These are some examples of our daily life, forget the angry looks and enmity faces often we come across on fellow drivers. The story of our traffic on common roads is that of desperateness and quite often, arrogance, as examples listed above.

We have various reasons to justify the type of driving on the roads- but none justifies the danger it can often attribute to the driver, fellow drivers or pedestrians.

Driving on the roads is a social learning, and as like many phenomena depends on the attitude. We have almost all best brands of cars, bikes or bicycles of the world in our roads. Roads too are improving (though one could ideally think of still better). If driving has to be secure, safe and peaceful then attitude needs a change, among anyone who drives.

In places like Europe, US or UK, driving is considered as a pleasure, or a stress-reliever. In addition to the cars and roads it’s the attitude of the drivers that makes driving a pleasure! There is more a mood of competition and unfriendliness in our system of driving compared to the largely cooperative and friendly attitude of drivers in some countries. The relaxed, satisfied, friendly, confident and helpful faces behind the steering is so pleasing compared to the grim, unfriendly, angry, serious, suspicious and threatening faces!

Recently while in IIT Madras, viewing a ”driverless” car project in an innovation experiment, I was amazed to learn that there could be as much as 60 emotions that can flash across a driver’s face depending on the various factors and scenarios one encounters during driving. This was being explored there , to study reactions that could help maneuver the driving in the driverless project. These emotions are attempted to be plotted to decide the reaction of the movement of the car without the driver.

Essentially, it’s the attitude of arrogance that persists and raises rages on roads. Again, driving is not the mechanical art of holding the steering and controlling a vehicle, it’s a big responsible social activity! Respecting fellow drivers, passengers and helping and guiding each other. There is a soft skill art, which is often ignored in driving, on how especially the emotional balance and respect for others can be maintained.

Well this attitude again could be built up as a child in homes and class rooms, but, only if, the child sees the same that is taught in the class is seen on roads. If not (s) he learns the opposite, theory for class rooms and arrogance for practice, which they see around.

The soft skill training in driving especially driving etiquettes and mindset of respecting and considering the fellow drivers has to be an inevitable part of the formal training.

Distracted driving, especially with drivers using cell phones in two-wheeler and other vehicles has to be dealt with caution. Often, this is casually done resulting in loss of innocent lives! An alarming fact that is added new to the list is the death due to the accidents caused by careless crossing of roads (looking at cell phones). Talking and texting are dangerous on roads: talking on the phone distracts us but texting is still more dangerous since the user can’t or doesn’t see the path in front. It’s important that “Cell phone civics” is added in drivers training to ensure the health and life of drivers as well as others.

If only, we could swap the skills of acrobats and arrogance with tolerance, respect and give-way-to-others attitude to fellow drivers, driving will be safe, peaceful and an experience to look forward to. It’s especially so in the present times since people spend more time on roads , travelling and there is an evolving social system called “traffic jams”.

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The Anatomy of Experience

by with No Comment ExperienceLifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

July 16, 2017

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Education

The Anatomy of Experience

Number of years of simple existence doesn’t imply experience (not at least in the sense I connote) Many say they have long years of experience in a job, or profession – but the number of years of existence need not make you “wise” – rather it may make you “unwise” by thinking that the mathematics of countable years is always equal to “wisdom”. My feeling on Experience is transcribed here.

Definitely by sitting in an ascribed space (of a father, mother, son, daughter, friend etc) or achieved chair (profession, job, tas etc) for many years we are assumed to have gained experience. But need not necessarily be so. The key in Experience I believe is the wisdom imbibed in those years. The crux is “accruing and applying learning over years “ is experience. Or “ Wisdom, if gained, over years is experience”- it is not theory , it is Practice!

e.g. Daughter or son( or any one for that matter) wants to do what they wish which they are passionate about. We have our perceptions influenced by family, our own wishes and friends which may turn us around their wish. But if we have the ability to reflect on what is changing around us and elsewhere, relate their wish to reality and practicality, I feel wisdom is prevailing. Some may term it is maturity of thinking (?).

The layers or process of experience: Essentially experience is a congregate of “live”, “ learn” and “ link” which are interdependent and ever changing.

Live: would mean not mere existence, but the efforts of exploring the happiness and understanding of existence, sacrificing for family and society.. and could mean many things. An interesting definition of Life is “ a cumulative effect of a handful of significant shocks” in The Black Swan (Nassim Nicholas). He says to look into your personal life , choice of profession, meeting your spouse, your movement from once place to another, impoverishments and sudden enrichments .

Life can be moved only forward, can never be rewound (As Jiddu Krishnamurthy says “ Never be prisoners of the past”)

Learn: few essentials of learning and what it means are:

  • Facing success and failure.
  • Understanding that there is no “absolute success” or “failure in life”.
  • All are relative (endorsed by Albert Einstein).
  • There is what is called as book learning, then there is this thing called wisdom

The first is about life’s broken parts, the second its glorious sum.

(Thirukkural :373)

  • To enjoy beauty in everything. As humans, we share the patterns of inanimate and animate life that we find to be beautiful. But they differ. (The Promise of beauty and why it matters , Shakti Meira).
  • The knowledge that we know is much, much insignificant than the knowledge that exits out there ( As reminded by Thomas Kempis in The Imitation of Christ: Guard against the temptation to boast of your worldly learning and accomplishment).
  • Accommodating the views of others and positioning yourself in a society (and why not in a family!)

Link: The third element which completes the concept of experience is how you apply – Live-life and learning to move ahead. Its continuous: linking with children, parents, friends, colleagues, your passions and it’s a day-to-day, moment-to-moment affair, Its this linking that makes you eligible for “wise”.

All religions handhold us to wisdom, the mind-blowing path to ultimate reality. (Bagavadh Geetha’s Jnana Yoga: the mind is used to inquire into its own nature and to transcend the mind’s identification with its thoughts and ego is a process of linking). Knowledge in that sense is lower in order and not a great contributor to experience, but in a general sense : Knowledge is an essential prerequisite for the humans to enter into wisdom. But quite often the paradox is that you get entangled and engaged in “Knowledge” and lose the exciting path to wisdom( a larger debatable topic is whether knowledge is essential for wisdom.. like in case of great saints and gurus who attain wisdom.. well, I am talking about common man).

Knowledge is what we are formally tested for (examinations!) and we are conditioned to from our childhood to attain a graduate or post graduate degree. Graduation doesn’t guarantee wisdom , it vouches for the knowledge (as certified by a School or University). In one way if the educational process is not ideal we are weaned away from wisdom!

“Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge?

Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?” (T S Eliot)

Next time when we say experience please reflect on your Live-life, learning and how much you have linked it all…

Tethered Education

As we move through the timeline, brushing aside the events, to be symbols for the future, called as history, one thing that remains constant among few is the examination system.

The essence of education as a process to help learners – to control life, enjoy life and ultimately to understand life (Will Durrant, Fallen Leaves)– is largely replaced by the changing priority as a means to appear and score in examination and this is denaturing the form of the beautiful concept of education. Education is now somewhat like tied up to the stub of examination. It rotates around that.

Education, especially higher education, is an opportunity that a learner purposefully searches and indulges in. A person chooses higher education for the purpose of learning and exploring. (that is why we have PhD in all subjects Doctor of Philosophy… irrespective of what subject a person is pursuing- (s)he does History, Physics, biotechnology, English or history). However in our University system or other educational systems , education, that is getting a degree or diploma is linked with Jobs. We start to do a degree or diploma that gives us a job. Nothing wrong in the thinking in one perspective. But the objective learning is often hindered with thoughts of job and examination.

We have forgotten what curiosity and originality are. Richard Gerver ( a school headmaster) in his book Change mentions about how curious a child is from the time (s)he starts speaking, asking equations on why… how what when… to parents and relatives. Once the child is admitted in the School, you can observe that after few years the number of questions raised by the child are less or nil. He has learned to be “uniform” with the class sacrificing different “diverse” talents , which examination do not promote. Rousseau says that “education comes to us from nature from men or other things, he is regarding nature as equivalent to endowment – the inherited dispositions and capacities of theh individual. All great educationists from Socrates (The Bhagavat Gita is the typical example of confronting with a problem and the management solutions offered by Lord Krishna, Arjuna though doesn’t get a certificate for that!) Loyola, Freebel to Dewey or great saints like Jesus have only taught to understand ourselves.

Read the above observations with that of Thomas Fried man (Thank you for being late, 2016): “We entered a world (around 2007) where connectivity was fast , free, easy for you and ubiquitous and handling complexity became fast , free and easy for you , and invisible”. This points to the need of synthesizing the Zeitgeisten summaries of education though different ages to the phantasmagorical technology-era we live now. It is important to have a method of evaluation other than examination in this fast changing technological world to liberate the mind of learners to focus on the joy of learning rather the pains and anxiety of examination. The children are so conditioned from LKG or 1st standard to this unpleasant experience of examination which takes away the joy and fun of real education.

(What could be a new pattern of evaluation for a happy learning… to be continued as time permits!)

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Teenagers: Parenting for the best

by with No Comment Lifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

March 29,2020

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Lifestyle

Teenagers: Parenting for the best

The beautiful picture depicts the full blossomed life of an individual. From the centre of the flower where we are born, to the next layers of petals of different colours we go through various stages, expanding in maturity and understanding depicted by the different concentric patterns of petals. In this is the transitional layer of “teenage” which many of the readers above 18 have gone through. This is a brief look at how parents (and teachers) need to help the teenagers especially in the present times.

Teenage is a transformational period of our life- the unique and most important transition in human development. Possibly one could divide the life of an individual, biologically (which has social implications) into childhood, teenage and adulthood.

It is a world of new experiences, fascinations, likings (and disliking), confusion, fan-worships, fun, and infatuations. Every adult has a part of the “teen” in them. But then, they are mature enough to understand the goodness and to realise facts over a period of time.

This stage of transition for children is different nowadays from what it was few decades ago for various reasons. To mention two:

  1. The main stakeholders who had a role 20 or 30 years back were the parents, grandparents, relatives, teachers and friends. The Joint family system (or extended family with more members) helped in hearing the versions of the teenagers and acted as a solace in a family. In addition to hearing by the elders, this also brought in serendipitous learning to all. The nuclear family system has reduced the human interaction to a limited parent-to-child.
  2. The omnipresent technology or media and their access has made it an important stakeholder in shaping the thoughts of child as (s)he moves on in this Google age.

Parents and teachers need to realise that children when going through the phase as “teenager” are often young to understand the first experiences of natural changes in body and thinking. They may challenge, question or react in a manner parents do not expect (not always)! The parents have to learn that its largely natural, and accordingly set their maturity to the tune of “temporary whims and fancies”. Some parents find it hard to relate to their children when they are teenagers. It’s tough if we think so, but it’s a management in parenting and every parent should have an insight about this.

In a nuclear family, with parents having their own busy schedule at work, on net or TV the teenager is dependent more on the media. But any answer from the searches, will be short of the emotional and personal touches and clarifications they get from mother, father or teachers! And that’s key for a teenager of today.

The ages of teen is the first stage of exploring an identity in life. Anxiety, shyness, dilly- dallying, appearance, feelings, timid, challenging, perfection, liking, loving… there are many combinations we go through.

Some parents remark (s)he is acting strange – weird. But in reality the parent is unable to listen and understand to the natural phenomenon of changes in thinking of the child; and to accept it. Instead of considering this as different and unnatural, if parents accept this and then try to explore on why (s)he thinks so, the child feels comfortable.

Teenage is a period of life in which some feel thinking, talking, feeling etc of a different nature is a “mistake” and they brood on these without sharing. If shared (or the parents give the atmosphere of sharing) the family can realise this as often trivial and could ease the worry or heaviness on the child. Marks in class, recognition, achievements, abilities, affiliations, comparisons… all are to be dealt with an open mind. Because it’s a natural transitional period. for positioning the personality for the future. The success of parents/teachers is the ability to give a confident situation in which (s)he can open up anything and get their support. Build that confidence and trust.

An important message at this stage is not to sink into the infatuations of ascribed “love” and sacrifice this transitional period to a life of worries, fights and conflicts. The real love often gets clearer after the “teenage cloudiness” of a loaded mind of feelings, fan-fares, glitter and pomp. This is a period in which the parents have to guide them (walking with their thoughts and sorting it). Teachers have a big role, as they have seen many students growing through these stages and excellent teachers can make a difference. They have the duty to listen, care and guide the children to the unknown wisdoms of children, which the students are yet to achieve. They are touching the future.

Parents care for their children (sometimes over cared ). As children some don’t think and accept how we hold them. As a teenager it becomes important that (s)he also feels we care, since an enquiry mind of thinking would have started. LISTEN to them. Hear and feel their versions. Some may be silly, insignificant, from your perception; but do not ignore the importance with which they put it.

Avoid conflicts. If you shout or get angry at a teenager after years of your maturity what does it say? Even though you know what a teenager is asking for is not genuine , never give a point blank “No” until it’s so serious (which is generally not). There might be an element of thought that you may not have felt from his/her perspective. Be patient and positive in listening. Impatient and sarcastic listening are sometimes worse than not listening to!

Don’t push to fall in line with the “parental aspirations”. In childhood the child may easily get coerced to aspirations of parents, and teachers. But in teenage, (s)he would have started experiencing what they like. If what they like is different from parental aspirations, a conflict can arise. It’s here again the parent /teacher has to be a good mentor on knowing the reasons for the “like”.

Accept teenagers as they are. Let them like, adore, enjoy and be fascinated during this discovery period about them and the world. The parents have to observe, and not to intervene unless they feel the children get tricked, decepted or trapped with these natural feelings. For this the parents (and teachers) need to know what they are at.

Mentor them without their knowing. That’s an art of parenting. “A bundle of advices” at this age may not be quite receptive to children. The best way is to “be with their ideas, and transform them if necessary”. Walk that extra mile alongwith their ideas.

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1593-min

Techno sapiens: the evolution in 2020

by with No Comment Technology

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

January 1, 2020

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Techonology

Techno sapiens: the evolution in 2020

We are changing. Like it or not. The change is slow, but sure. The new dawn of the third decade of this century starts bringing in a lot of technology-dependent activities carried over from the last two decades of fast accelerating innovations. Probably by 2030 the “techno sapiens” transitioning from ‘homo sapiens” (Latin meaning “wise man” introduced in 1758 by Carl Linnaeus) are going to be more perceptible

The decade of 2020, I consider, is going to be turning point of this century. It’s a determining decade because

  1. By 2030 there will be a majority in the population who are “techno-literate” who will be leading the world activities.
  2. This decade is likely to be crucial on deciding the nature of the human beings (including transformation on anatomical peculiarities) for the remaining centuries.
  3. This decade starts deciding on how the humans of this decade – whether they are the young , born into the techno-vibrant era, or before that era – are going to be.

Some evident examples which “nurture” the Techno sapiens or “denature” the homo sapiens are mentioned below.

It’s a comparison of the Homo sapiens (what we were) Versus Techno sapiens (What we are, or going to be)

  1. “Passive forwarders” of messages and images – a compulsory (dis)order. Its connectivity irrespective of originality or creativity.
  2. Behavioral differences in eliciting responses in a normal communication (including irritability and callousness in active listening) which is sequel to the omnipresent technology.
  3. Paradox in “distance destroyed”: closer members living in physical proximity may be “too far” to see and listen Vs unknown friends living in corners of the globe who are connected and cared sans distance.
  4. “Camera philiac” and “selfie centric”
  5. Disconnecting with realities near around (like seeing stars in a sky) Vs Virtually connecting with far off (like seeing stars or universe from a computer in a cozy room).
  6. Indicators of virtual-world-life being invented more than the physical world.
  7. “Enquiring process” (enquiry mind, wisdom) Vs “instant information” (information-rich, knowledge)
  8. “Physical sports and games Vs technology games
  9. “Positioned instincts” Vs “Displaced instincts”

We can plot the evolution of the Techno sapien!

The changes mentioned will have influences in different fields of daily life: like health, education, agriculture, law, politics, and administration

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Success as a student

by with No Comment Education

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

17 December 2017

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Education

Success as a student

This is an excerpt of a few points that I shared in my address to the students of Veterinary science after taking charge as Dean of Rajiv Gandhi Institute of Veterinary Education and Research (RIVER) Puducherry, recently. Thought it may have relevance to any college student. There is a greater role for teachers if the students need to follow these!

Being a college student is an opportunity blessed to you all. Many are there who couldn’t make it to a college. Whether by choice or by chance you are into an amazing subject of study.

You should first feel that you are fortunate and privileged to enter into the subject domain you have been offered.

Use the time of your study period, to learn about yourself and your capacities in addition to the subject you study.

Understanding you – your abilities and strengths- is impor

tant since your success in life depends on matching these abilities to the subject you are studying and delivering your service.

I consider the following 4Cs as the vital factors that will shape a student successful and useful to the Society and the Nation.

  1. Competence: it changes depending on the graduate course you have chosen.

1.1 Professional skills: For eg. In Veterinary Science the student who passes out after the five and half years course should have Day-one competency skills as stipulated by the Veterinary council of India.

1.2 Social skills: Irrespective of the courses, the students should develop skills understanding, analysing and approaching social issues.

1.3 Soft skills: Abilities to improve communication-spoken and written, basic language abilities in English, in addition to the mother-tongue or other languages, facing an interview, writing a CV, building confidence.

  1. Compassion: Understanding clients, patients or people for whom (s)he has to work for. The empathy and realisation of the conditions and problems of the society helps us to deliver the subject (or knowledge) in a fuller manner, making education more meaningful. It takes us one step towards Wisdom.
  2. Creativity: Whatever may be the subject of study, students need to learn innovating and improvising. Once they receive the certificate and start working with the world, they realise that many things and thoughts have to be modified. College should be the place where they should get experience for that. They should reinvent curiosity (in case they have forgotten it), which takes them through originality and finally creativity.
  3. Connectivity. The present day order is connectivity, like our globe rotates around its axis, connectivity is the axis on which our lives revolve. Instant Information is the key mantra of the human civilization of the present day. Whether its the internet, social media or whats app, connect wisely. Technology is neutral; it is the people who apply or use them who distort the neutrality or usefulness. Creating connections lets you grow more useful to the society.

We have a dominant examination system compared to the education system. Need to respect it. However if you get less marks please don’t think it is the end of the world. Don’t start worrying. Instead, find out why you got less marks and try to address it next time. There is always a good next time, provided you don’t get stressed and worried.

Believe in yourself and that will surely lead to confidence.

The Degree certificate that you receive is a testimony of the knowledge of the subject that you have undergone. It’s a license to enter into the real world, where real learning starts.

Be prepared for the cycle of “Learn- Unlearn- Relearn” continuously for a successful life.

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Stressed with the unexpected? the art of transforming dissonance to consonance!

by with No Comment LifeLifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

February 5, 2022

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Life, Lifestyle

Stressed with the unexpected? the art of transforming dissonance to consonance!

(The image is the cover page of the College Magazine 1981-82 for which I was the Editor. The art work was done by Dr. Chandran K, 1981 batch student, later who worked as a dedicated veterinarian who is an amazing artist - no digital technologies! I thought this will be a message that can tell us "we break, to unite")

We often meet the unexpected “good” and “bad” in life. It’s usually the bad that gives us stress of hurt and sadness – the bad which we never expected! “WE” is a broad term – it’s a prism which refracts beams including kids, children, teen, youth, young, old.., at any point of time. We grow with (or supposedly have to grow with) dealing with stress as we move up the ladder of age, but the ladder has new surprises in store as we climb up (or down!) the age. We have more diverse and new roles in family and society, and hence new challenges and stress.

Stress from the unexpected bad can drive us to pessimism and doubt.

In a general sense how we take up the situations depend on the nature and type of “unexpectedness” (unexpected events and situations, in general not good happenings in life), and varies with the age and the realistic maturity we possess for the age.

Accidents, diseases, death, deceits…all these “bad” when happens unexpected (which often are, as I started this article!), it hurts and upsets us. The relationships if closer, we feel the blind end which can give us shock, confusion, guilt and helplessness and a feeling of let down by Life.

This is the start of dissonance (conflict) within us which is understandably human, for a temporary period for emotional resurgence. It is a learning phase of life -to cope with the unexpected and move ahead. In short this is what education has to mentor us for. We get expertise in knowledge domains in arts science… for what? Jobs, security, relationships…Fine! But then all these have domains beyond the Knowledge of Expertise; in fact success of life or dealing with unexpectedness is usually only by Knowledge beyond domains of expertise.

The emotional balance is built on fabric of relationships, which we need to strengthen to overcome the unexpectedness. It’s the wisdom of connectedness. Sharing and caring helps to ease them out. “Overcoming” the unexpectedness is a reality and a certainty of life which we need to learn and teach. This is the start of Consonance.

Accepting the unexpectedness, and realistically facing the “bad” is the first step to conflict resolution. This relieves us, and help us to see the faint light at the end of the otherwise dark path. Believe we are in this world capable of doing this. Clarity of mind during the turbulent times makes us strong to move ahead to deal with the unexpectedness, rather than succumbing to that!

Offer help to others, wherever you feel you can be of help in holding them to override the unexpectedness. This will help people to recover from the temporary phase of doubt and pessimism. Family, friends, people from work places, spirituality (irrespective of religions) all help us in this.

If the unexpected situation is a persistent one, intentionally created by humans, purposefully to hurt or harm, fight it or come out of the situation and lead your life, for, ultimately we seek the path of happiness in life; existing with dignity in a fearless atmosphere among peaceful relationships, is what ultimately matters. Within these we can always try finding our way opening in the front.

Share “your breaths of life” (words or deeds) for others to breathe back to life.

Life takes us through the path of unexpected falls, but as a principle of life, we fall to rise, from unfulfilled dreams, to full fillable alternates.

Consonance is blessed with every person, to melt the misery of dissonance;

it’s with us, never part with it in times of worry.

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Privileged pleasure: the nano-feeling

by with No Comment EducationExperienceProfession

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

March 29,2020

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Profession

Privileged pleasure: the nano-feeling

One of the blessings of being a teacher over three decades is the opportunity life gives to witness and feel the success of the performance of students in different roles. It happens quite often, and the moments are so fulfilling that it also gives a clue on the purpose of life. Life has innumerable beads of such feelings (nano-feeling) to thread on. This is not on the success of so many students who have built their reputation in different fields of the profession, but on micro-moments of multi-pleasure experiencing the transitions in a student.

She was one of the many faces in 1986, sitting in the bench in a class room listening to my lectures at that time. A calm, composed, hardworking, silent, systematic student, who was keen on achieving academically, and eager in gaining good marks. Soft spoken and hesitant to complete sentences in front of a teacher (just for the politeness and respect she held for teachers).

  1. I am on a stage. Officially evaluating the Workshop performance of a group of teachers of the University on the posters displayed by each faculty-group. I was observing her from the stage, after 25 years, placed a little far of. She was leading one group, with few others who were also former students. I visualized that the foreign delegate has asked for a clarification to this group which I couldn’t hear from far. But then suddenly I saw her image transform from the “class room girl” two decades back (an impression that lives with me of students!), to an ever ready knowledge source, with much maturity.

My inquisitiveness had no boundary to find on how she performs. As she gently removed her eye glasses from the face, and held on to the temple of the reading glass, her eyes spread wide. Looking confidently at the person she started to clarify. Bold and specific, she actively sprung to a competent, communicative scientist, who never can be ignored. My observations were validated from the satisfaction and glow of gladness on the face of the delegate who asked the question.

Awestruck by the mind-reading on the performance of the student (who is a senior person now), gave me one of the fascinating feeling of satisfaction and joy.

This made me realize (like in various occasions involving former students in their success and performance) the depth of the imprint the images of classroom and teacher had in me! The radiance of competence, confidence and communication in the students’ face is the unit of love that gives an intense, and immeasurable feeling (nano-feeling!) for teachers who cared them.

Interestingly, and not surprisingly this nano-feeling for teachers is the greatest and unique gift the profession gives – not for assessments nor for any gains.

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Listening : the lifeline of harmony

by with No Comment LifeLifestyle

STRANDOMS: the stray and random thoughts

October 18, 2017

Prof. S. Ramkumar

Education

Listening : the lifeline of harmony

Heard Melodies Are Sweet, but Those Unheard Are Sweeter” Therefore, ye soft pipes, play on;…. “Ode on a Grecian Urn” : Keats. The lines reflecting that the power of thought, imagination and anticipation is often greater than the act itself. Are we staking these powers to continuous use of smart phones ?

She doesn’t listen to what I am saying!

My father doesn’t understand why I want to do something!

My mother doesn’t listen to what I am saying!

Any time you see my son, he is on the mobile phone!

He is not listening in the class, but hooked to the phone!

She is playing a lot with phone!

She doesn’t wear what I am telling.

He doesn’t hear what I am talking; he is simply on the phone !

Some examples of comments, which reverberates, often, in unexpected consequences. Some of these comments expressed out are heard, some unheard, some are listened, some are not. Many of these go unexpressed too. But many can create issues of stress if not properly understood!

This article is an attempt to understand “listening” to others (as evidently stray thoughts pulled randomly) so as to understand one perspective of “listening” in the present day. It is an inter generational, technology perspective. This may help in better self-realization, for a learned listening!

History has been a timeline of “events”. Civilizations, trade, wars, explorations, discoveries, inventions etc are used individually or clustered as points of reference to develop, understand and explain events for the periods for which we seek insights into. To quote an example “ science” has been a tool of change in human history (from ancient Plato through the new scientific revolution – attributed to Galileo since 1630s), or later “technology” is an eventful history maker. (they are though intrinsically connected).

The timeline (or era) of history, with the advent of accelerated inventions of technologies in society in the last two decades, has shorter time-spans of eventful happenings that makes ripples of faster change, compared to the slow happenings arranged over a longer period of years in the previous centuries. One of the simple ways to look at it (especially from the thought of the topic of present discussion- listening) is to place people in Generation boxes (Gen Box) by virtue of the year of birth.

“Information” “Instant Connectivity & information”

Newspaper Gen Radio Gen TV Gen Computer Gen Internet Gen Mobile Gen Google Gen Android Gen Whats app Gen

(One can modify this in any manner of logic and history!).

I designed this classification for the vital component of “ Information” that runs through all these generations, and as we start from Computer Gen we find that we are travelling beyond information to “instant connectivity”. One way of understanding “listening” is first to place ourselves in an appropriate gen box. Then look into the Gen Box of the listener.

The Gen box is a representation of the realm of reality on which our behaviours are usually founded upon. It is natural and fair. People are often comfortable with others in the same Gen box, from a perspective of technology-based approach (though issues in communication happen at intra Gen box level too) than with gen boxes farther away from them. It’s important to accept and understand the “realms of realities” in other Gen boxes, for continued “basic commonness” for meaningful communication. Listening is the primary step in this acceptance.

For eg. a TV Gen mother talking to a post-google gen daughter. The behaviors of these two are naturally influenced by the context, values, habit, ethics (and many more) they have evolved through. The main point is that they vary a lot. Listening (the predominant function of successful communication) for one may not be the behaviour expected from the other. The perception that we possess is a product of many factors like the “gene Kit” we are handed over and the environment which nurtures us. To make a complex phenomenon simple, let us call it “Identity” of an individual.

Identity has more to with “becoming” , than with “being”, and it’s a process that starts right from birth. The mirror that our environment holds up to us determines who we become (Paul Verhaeghe, 2014: What about me?).

As we advance, two fundamental tendencies would seem to be typical of every living being: we want to be part of the greater whole, and at the same time we long for independence.

Revisiting the earlier example of the TV-mother and Google-daughter, now, in addition to the Gen Box, it is growing to the interaction of two identities. It is in this situation listening warrants more care from the communicators. The speed of the technological changes (and hence growing diversity in gadgets), identity (in terms of “brands” over a growing market economy), communication (that attempts at connectivity at a physical level across the globe: now its only virtual!) all have created a new “global civilization”. These were changing over a period of time, to the present neo-liberal era, in which consumer is the key. The present positioning of all Gen boxes are embedded within the global civilization – like it or not!

For eg. From “product” to “product-of-class (brand)” – may it be clothes, phones, bikes – the new Gen refers to the “brand” of a product rather than a product. It’s not the material but the brand that is message of people in the present day market- based society, especially the e-marketing with Amazon, Flipkart and so on.

How do two Gen boxes synchronize for a happy living? By Change.

It is not simply a question of making the “other” change; the painful truth is that we, too, will have to change ((Paul Verhaghe, 2014). Thomas Friedman, 2016 (Thank you for being late) also states the significance of changing or adapting to new technologies (in terms of Identity has more to with becoming) so as to be on Board of reality of the present day. Called as the Big Shift, they argue, is that we are moving from a long period of history in which “stocks” were the measure of wealth and the driver of growth – to a world in which the most relevant source of comparative advantage will be how rich and numerous are the “flows” passing through your country or community and how well trained your citizen-workers are to take advantage of them. It calls us to learn faster by working together and to pull out of ourselves more of our true potential, both individually and collectively. New Gen has the advantage of being born into this phenomenon. Others have to reinvent their skills and mindset to adapt for a “common minimum understanding”.

Listening (the key tool in communication) happens across generation boxes. Listening happening within a Gen box is usually uneventful, since the equations of the day generally bear similar meaning for all. While listening to the connected world around, find time to disconnect-to-connect with nearer, or learn to accept a new pattern of listening.

Accept intergenerational box differences and change wherever possible. We can’t exclusively blame the new gen for the “Hi Speed travel in the Information Motorway”, which science and technology offers, and we not coping with them. Ensuring values (listening rather than commanding plays a vital role) could strengthen the order and life, whichever generations we belong to.

“I indulged myself one evening, after a seminar in a dark conference room in a Mumbai hotel, to sit quietly in the roof-top restaurant for dinner, and watch the sunset fading over the Arabian sea. A young man and women sat on the table next to mine. Then another woman joined them. *Thoreau’s three chairs. I thought. Except that they had the Arabian Sea and a warm sunset outside, instead of Walden Pond and snow. The waiter lit a candle on their table, brought champagne in a bucket, and poured three flutes for them. They raised their champagne flutes , looked up from their smart phones for a few seconds at each other, said “cheers”, and quickly returned to their smart phones to find out what was happening in the world elsewhere. They didn’t seem interested in what was happening in each other’s hearts or minds.

Arun Maira, 2017.

Listening for well being: conversations with people not like us. P 103.

*Thoreaus”s three chairs: Henry David Thoreau, the American Philosopher wrote in Walden (1845) “I had three chairs in my house; one for solitude, two for friendship and three for society.” He could sit in one chair and watch the autumn outside, geese on the pond and the flurry of snow. He could listen to his own thoughts detached from others, while seasons changed.

I was pleasantly surprised when one of the Faculty in a college recently wrote interesting verses, stating that the person was in solitude and inventing the fineness of nature during that time: Thoreau’s first chair ! Many of us use the chairs; if not we need to! Search these chairs: find the Wordsworth, Bharatiyaar, Gandhiji, Mother Teresa, Changampuzha, Marie Curie, Nelson Mandela… and so many. Transform to them (to their mindsets). We need to place the chair for sometime so that we can internally listen to self, friends, family and society. Listening is life.

Listening is a purposeful thought process, Settings affect our thoughts. Eg. Silence improves our thoughts. It might be quite difficult to aspire for “thoughts” (and hence listening ) amidst the “noise” of the TV soap opera or sounds of bashing big beat songs (not the sound of music!).

In Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age, (2015), Prof. Sherry Turkle, at MIT argues that just as Thoreau needed these symbolic chairs in his cabin near Walden Pond, we need a similar social structure to communicate effectively. But cell phones are damaging our capacity for engaged conversation, she suggests, and thus our capacity for friendship and social connection.

For eg., Turkle argues that we avoid solitude, Thoreau’s first chair, by constantly checking our cell phones, despite the fact that we need this solitude to truly know ourselves. With cell phones, “we turn to other people to support our sense of self,” robbing us of the self-knowledge necessary for rich conversations! She claims that in the end, we are sacrificing conversation for connection!

Respect the Gen boxes, do not blame the Gen boxes, Learn to live with different Gen boxes, understand that “Identity” undergoes changes with time and technology, from utility to brand, realize conversations are important in the age of connectivity , disconnect and reconnect, have the three Thoreau’s chairs… Its listening, and an intergenerational technology perspective for a new order of harmony for the present day.

Did you listen today?

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